Wedding Babies and Training

Finally!
Dumelang borra le bomma. Le Tsogile Jang? Re tsogile sentle. (Hello Ladies and Gentlemen. How are you? We are fine.)

Yes, we are alive and well. First, I want to apologize to all of you that have been gracious in sharing about your lives while we have not given any visuals or information about our lives here in Botswana. Sorry. It is not as easy as heading to the coffee shop for a few hours and wirelessly sending you some information.
I do not want to elaborate and bore you too much with how training was but overall it went fairly well. 60 Peace Corps trainees, including Laura and myself, arrived in Botswana sometime in mid April, moved into a local families house, and went through Peace Corps training for two months. Our days consisted of language training in the mornings, followed by HIV/AIDS sessions and cultural adjustment so to speak. It was fairly taxing considering we sat through session after session from roughly 8:00 to 17:00. Overall, it was necessary and gave us valuable insight to the complexities, challenges, and way of life here in Botswana.

On the whole, the other volunteers are great. We have all made it through training and we have had no one drop out. This is quite a feat considering on average 10-15% leave during training worldwide. Reflecting on our two months together and now that we have our freedom back, I would have to say that we really like and admire most of the people that we are serving with and look forward to working together over the next two years. Now, we are placed all over the country.

I do want to talk about a few experiences during our home stay with Mma and Rra Poloko Mothlobogwa. They are awesome. He is around 82 and she is around 75 years of age. She does not look a day over 60 and still works like she is a 40 year old woman. I guess one might say that all those years of hard work have actually benefitted her.

They have 9 grown children, most working at professional jobs in various parts of the country. Rra knows NO English and Mma gets by due to the fact she had a Peace Corp volunteer in the past. We learned so much from them culturally as they are old fashioned. It was fascinating how traditional Mma and Rra are; while their children are much more modern. This one family was such a prime example of how this country is in transition from old world to the modern world.

The newborn in the house was a prime example of how the traditional life and modern wonders were constantly at odds. Their daughter, Dolly, had a newborn. The baby was 2 months old when we arrived. Dolly used nappies (diapers) and let anyone hold the baby and care for her. On the other hand, Mma would not let her burn the soiled nappies as she thought it would bring bad luck to the baby, and she did not let me handle the baby at first since there is the two month confinement tradition. Before the baby was allowed to be handled by me, according to Mma, the traditional healer had to come and give her traditional medicines to protect her from evil spirits. All the while, Dolly was handing the baby to me to help and secretly burning the nappies in the yard. Dolly, obviously was not present for the traditional healers ceremony. This was a great introduction to all the changes that are happening between generations in this small country of 1.8 million.

Laura was required to do the household work. Mma put her to work the minute we would walk in. And since there is not really a word in Setswana for please, getting used to the orders took some time. We cooked traditional foods, outside by the fire as well as in the kitchen. A great welcoming to Botswana and a family we will see often since we have been posted here in Moleps.

After all, she has given us our Setswana names and considers us her children. My name is Thusoetsile, meaning ‘help has arrived’ and Laura’s is Kelebogile meaning ‘gift from God’. The village knows me by Thuso.

The first weekend we arrived their last born had a wedding at the house. What an event. It is much different than our traditions back in the States. (Who knows what those are as we all know about Matt and I’s wedding tradition.) First of all, the groom is required to give the brides family her worth in cattle. Yes, Botswana is cow country. Sana, the last born, and most brides in Botswana, are worth 8 cows! What a cheap price since Joe and Kathy would have received at least 15 cows…..

Meanwhile, the wedding is open to really anyone that wants to come, it is a community affair and everyone chips in to do their part. The women are cooking endlessly in huge pots in the backyard while the men are in charge of the meat. Sounds similar huh? Not really, there is a striking difference.

The day before the wedding we arrived home from training a bit early and noticed a group of men, from both families, sitting next to the krall (a place to store cattle in the community). There were 5 cows or beasts, as they are called here, in the krall ready for slaughter. I rushed inside to get a sport coat on and to witness the action. When you are with elders at such an event a sport coat is a sign of respect and much needed. Anyways, a registered local man pulls a rifle from the box, and boom, the cows dies right through the eyes from about 25 feet. Yeah, it was crazy. Next, he gives the gun to one of the groom’s family members and boom, #2. It proceeds until all 5, with only a single shot each, fall to the ground. I really couldn’t believe it. As you might have assumed, the women are not allowed to witness this event. They only hear the shots and after each one, they make this crazy sound with their mouth. I can’t explain the sound on paper. The women are also sitting around, in traditional attire, telling the bride what is expected of her as a wife and what she can expect as a married woman.

Meanwhile in the men’s department, I was told you don’t enter the krall unless you have your own knife, so I rushed back inside, changed from my sport coat to a t-shirt and grabbed my blade. All the men in the community began skinning and butchering all 5 cows. I was so amazed as I had never seen this procedure. I started in with a group of 4 guys and one beast. I grabbed a camera but some of you all may not enjoy the photos. (Not sure I can find a computer that will upload photos on this blog but I will try soon.) By the end of the night the cows were butchered, not a single piece of the beasts were wasted, and I really mean not a single part. In Botswana their favorite part is the intestines and were cooked immediately because the men couldn’t wait to get their fair share. It was all brought to the storage house in back, ready for preparation the next day. (Not to mention that these same carcasses were laying around the house for weeks, could possibly even be random parts around the compound as we write this six weeks later.) What an event. The best part was that everyone that helped with butchering got a nice portion to take home for their families to enjoy. Even after the wedding we had beef around for a month and people would come over everyday with empty plates to get some dinner. What an event, we got to witness a traditional wedding right away.

Ke a leboga (thank you) to the entire Poloko family for all they did for us, you are a part of us forever……………….. (Hopefully some of the nine children are reading this.)